The Weakly Video - White People Can't Dance

Well what about us asian people?! What's our shit??
(Featuring ?uestlove from The Roots!)

Updates and what's-its

This has been a busy week and it ain't over yet.
First off Monday, nothing cool.
Tuesday morning, got my tickets for the Finntroll concert that very night.
It was a fun concert I'd say, I duno if I'll want to see them again, but I was just a meter away from the band (it was a small venue), so I was basically getting smashed and crushed by about 80 drunk fatasses and canadians in the back. I gotta say Finntroll's songs are pretty catchy, so catchy that it's bad if you mix it with alcohol.
Maybe next time I'd be further away.
When I was lining up for the concert I saw two dudes come out and go to the grocery store, they looked like guys from the band, but to me roadies and set up guys all look the same.
Turns out it WAS them, the bassist and the guitarist, casually getting cigs. But anyway, what would I make them sign?
In the end they shook hands as they were leaving the stage. Meh... didn't get my hand shaken... bummer.
The first band was Crimson Shadows. They were good, I liked them, I gotta check them out.
And also a last thing, I think Finntroll played their songs a little slower than on their album, it felt less catchy I thought, but I hope this was only because of the drummer, who didn't seem to be part of the band; he was the only bald dude...!
All in all a pretty good concert, it felt good to see them! They played all my favorite songs!

Wednesday JISA movie night, with two movies, GO and PING PONG. They were OK, but at the end the DVD lagged and froze. This is what you get for 5 bucks in Chinatown you cheap bastards!

Then yesterday a sudden program to Oakville. I took the GO bus from the uni with Kenta and we went to his place, he helped me out on my jazz lessons, and we went out to see Jojeto at this Irish pub called Finnegan's Wake (sounds piraty...). Apparently the flyer read Joe Jeto instead of Jojeto, so we constantly made fun of them ('This is Mr.Jeto, he'll kick your ass!" "haha very funny Kenta!" "So is there a Mrs.Jeto?" "No! But there's a Mr.s Jeta!")
The gig was hardcore! Jordan opened his thumb and bled all over his drum kit and white pants, Vance's shoulder cracked and at some point he just collapsed on his knees during the guitar solo.
"That part when you saw me kneel and bow down artistically was actually because of my shoulder in excruciating pain..." Hyeah I thought he was feeling the music so hard that he kneeled down like he was having an orgasm, kinda like Chino Moreno....
It was good seeing them again, they're nice guys, really fun!

So all in all a very busy week. And I love it. Next week; Dinner and Karaoke night, and perhaps a local res party tonight.

As for my love life, well I gotta give out a brief summary:
This summer in August this one chick came over to my place and we like did it hardcore for 4 days straight, up to like maybe 4 times a day! Man I never knew I could last so long. Maybe because somebody didn't take good care of me before eh...
She basically treated me so well, gave me great pleasure and fulfilled my (about) 6 years of frustration in 4 days!! Amazing; I didn't jack off for like 2 weeks straight! I was basically temporarily cured!
Sex buddies do the trick I tell ya.

So then now that I'm back in the 2nd hottest school in North America (right behind UCLA), I feel like having another sex buddy, because university can get a little lonely some nights, even if you have enough friends to go out with. It's also seeing all these really pretty girls around makes me so excited, but the catch is that they're all taken. Most boys in the school are single, and most girls are taken. Go figure.
So what am I doing? Well basically scavenging, hunting, making new friends (not necessarily girls), but in short 'Planting Seeds'. It doesn't matter who I meet, if I want sex or just friendship, as long as I'm planting seeds, I should be able to sex them in about 4 years (that's how long the 'sex plant' takes to grow). If I'm lucky I can sex them this year.

Yes I know it's rather sad, but you see, it's rather hard for me, although I have a beard, I look dirty, I'm a bit overweight (actually I lost weight yay!), the big thing is that I have charisma (shut up if you don't agree), so I guess I can attract somebody with talk and acts, which is hard for the first time I meet someone, since looks count.

So yes, chicks and pussy everywhere, but all these girls are already taken.

So what do I do? Just chill, and enjoy this fucking awesome country.

From Toronto with busy days,
-Teoman

Yipee!!

Well I got my Finntroll ticket, and I'm rockin it tonight!!!
C ya later, bitches!!

The Weakly Video - Princess Mononoke AMV: Finntroll - 'Grotans Barn'

I don't particularly like the bitch Mononoke, but since Finntroll's concert is upcoming this Tuesday (And I still don't have my tickets), and the music is well arranged with the video, I think this is a really good AMV to watch.

University Comfort - Part Deux

Today for some strange reason another fair came to the campus. This is like the.... 3rd fair so far maybe? The first one was pretty cool, Sony came over to sell some earplugs and chances to win shit, and we had free lunch (This country is freer than France btw).

Today's fair I had no idea would happen. There was a booth for people to sign up for the upcoming York Fest, York's yearly concert. There never are known bands though, it's kinda like french 'rock' fests where all the bands on the list are either not rock, are mostly african drum bands, or are just completely shady bands with cheesy names. But I heard one year Buck 65 came over which is pretty cool.

So in addition to that booth, all the other clubs layed their tables to promote themselves, once again. Once again the 10 million different catholic clubs layed their tables like last time (The Chinese Catholic Associaion, the Catholic Painters, the Christian Fishing Club, The Chatholic Donut Eaters etc.), the world clubs (Included Mixed Student's Association, Trinidad and Tobago students, York Association of Black Students), and of course major brands who came over to promote their shit. There was Telus which came over with a car (apparently we could win that Volvo), XBox 360 came over with a free booth (PS3 came last time and once again it was Motorstorm as usual), here's a picture:

Sony was here once again with their earplugs, buttplugs and I duno what else:

Then also Gillette who gave out free samples of their latest shaving products, and offered students free shaves (with the style they wanted). Yes I know you might think that we already shave for free, but these were professionals. It's like getting a professional beardcut or haircut for free:

Ah and surprise, the thing that really stunned me was the presence of Long & McQuade, selling their guitars and some equipment:

They were even selling packets of Dunlop .73 picks for 3.75 these bastards!! What a price, there were 12 picks in every pack, I bought one, excellent deal. I always lose my picks. Sheesh! Telus, XBox 360, Playstation, Gillette, Long & McQuade coming to campus to sell their shit and make us win prices and hand out free sweets, samples and earplugs, BEAT THAT, french universities!!!! In your face!

Then I walked around and saw what else there was to see. Heh, even Uncle Ben's was here giving out free rice packets, not samples, but actual rice packets like you buy them in the shop!My dinner is all settled. heh.

Then there were some campus party companies that came over, like University Party, Coors Light, and some other shit to promote jobs, events, nights and shit. I don't really go to night clubs, but I'm sure it's cool to hang out in a cheap college night club (When I mean cheap, I mean cheaper than French night clubs to get in, but a gagillion times better).

Then there was a company, I forgot who, where you could spin a wheel, with each box representing a different dance and a guy dressed in one of the Ninja Turtles (I think it was Donatello). If you fell for example on the 'Robot Dance' the Turtle would do the robot dance. It was fun to watch cos he wasn't that good but the costume was pretty nice.

And of course as usual Z103.5 was there, but I never knew what their booth was from, and if it was actually broadcasting from the school. Oh well.

It was a hot day and I got sweaty after a while with my bagpack and my jacket on. So I just headed back into my room.

Since yesterday, I don't have internet anymore, I'm using another person's computer right now, so I don't think there'd be a music update tomorrow. This fucking sucks.

From Toronto with no internet,

-Teoman

P.S. Elisha Cuthbert's sex tape coming out! Awesome!

The Weakly Video - Adventure Time

And Jake is dubbed by friggin John DiMaggio!!

University Comfort

Ah the joys of capitalism, right here in your university! Well... MY university... and it rocks


Bubble Tea for about 6.50.... a bit expensive, it's like the price of a meal, but what's important is spicy meat balls for just 50 cents


Three Twix (not the Twix as we know it, this one has peanut butter in it) for just a buck. Well actually a buck and 14 cents, they don't include taxes these bastards!


And finally last but, of course, definitely not least; Burger King's best offers for students only, Buy one Get one FREE! (The key word here is "Free")

The Weakly Video - Hybrid Assisted Limb

Finally exoskeletons come to the real world! By the way this is real.

Teoman's Band of the Month - Machine Head

Their latest album The Blackening is so epic that I had to expose this band out. I wasn't too much of a fan before The Blackening, because to me neo-metal or rapcore had its time, but they still deserve attention for their career and respect for what they have come up to until now.

Machine Head are:
-Robb Flynn (Guitar, Vocals)
-Phil Demmel (Guitar)
-Adam Duce (Bass)
-Dave McClain (Drums)

Machine Head have come a long way since their beginning in the mid 90s. They have gone from good old groove metal to rapcore, through nu metal with more hip-hoppy beats, but with their latest album The Blackening they have gone back to what makes metal metal , with epic songs with poignant lyrics, and beats that pay tribute to the best of thrash and groove metal.
I love Groove metal, from Chimaira to some of Metallica, and of course Pantera. The beauty of solos and the sounds of blues distorted and updated to today's violence is, I think, the true form of modern metal.
Their first album, Burn My Eyes was one of the most influential metal albums (along with such ones as Reign in Blood by Slayer), but perhaps THE most influential metal album of the 90s, as its recording surpassed any recording of other professional bands around such as Metallica or Pantera. For example, if you listen to Cowboys from Hell by Pantera, you'll hear that it still sounds garage, and that the bassline is not as pronounced as today's big metal bands, and the guitars sound saturated or fuzzy. Machinehead's Burn my Eyes used brand new technology that corrected this "garage" sound to make it closer to the sound of metal albums that we know today.
Since then every band uses the same recording technique, which keeps on getting better and more precise.
I keep on listening to their latest album The Blackening because I keep on finding little bits of music that we can guess who inspired them. Some solos remind me of "Chimairan" solos while others are more like "Panteran" and some riffs could be sometimes called "Metallican".
So we'll keep on the metal coming on this blog with Machine Head for the rest of the month!
Enjoy, fuckers!

Updates, Life Goes On and Shut the Fuck Up

Ah, the joy, the comfort, the mentality! I'm back in Canada, and I guess I'm happy in the sense of "satisfied". It was hotter and heavier than France when I set foot on soil, about 24 degrees, and an above average humidity rate, but it was apparently a "colder" day from a Canadian point of view. Good Ol' Kenta came to pick me up at the airport. I don't like passing customs and signing immigration papers all the time! It's boring and annoying. But if you want to control immigration it doesn't hurt to sign these papers.
But I mean, who could possibly answer "yes" to stuff like "Are you carrying any live endagered species of animal or plant?" or "Do you carry a monetary amount which 'conquers' (lawl) more than 10 000 canadian dollars?". Then again before living in Canada I had to sign up my first papers at the embassy with even better questions such as "Have you or members of your family ever been involved in a crime against humanity such as genocide, mass murder, war, individual murder or the extinction of a species" (Well not those very words, but around it). I wonder what the dudes who answer "Yes" get.
The plane ride was better than usual, I had a nice seat in Tempo, on the 2nd floor of a 747. It was my first time on a superior floor on a plane. It wasn't so different from the main floor, except that we were only 30 people, mostly all fully grown adults. There was one baby and I thought "Oh shit" but I never heard it during the flight so it's OK. Now you might think "good" but there is a "but" to this story. I was sitting next to a kid. Around 8 maybe, a little black girl. Throughout the trip she kept on looking at me all the time!!! It was really annoying, all of a sudden you see two white spots in the middle of a black face looking at you and you feel awkward. I was watching the Simpsons movie on my PSP and everytime I laughed she would look at me in a really serious manner which was sometimes disturbing. Not for like 2 seconds.... but for like 30 seconds to 1 minute non stop.... like trying to figure out the meaning of my being or something! Even when I just lifted my arm to scratch my head. And when she slept she would always put her elbow on the arm rest so there was no space for me! Damn kids!!
Other than that the seats were nice. If it weren't for that kid I would've had a perfect flight, at least I would've been less aggravated!
There was plenty of room for my legs, not as much as those seats in front of the exits, or First Class, but for an Economy class it was good!
There were some electronic boxes between the armrests and the wall, so there was enough room for me to put my bag, and take out my PSP and stuff that took up space in my bag. It's just the kid. That's all I wanted to be inexistent!!
Air France has made a lot of progress since the 90s now. The food is better, it was pretty good stuff. The staff is nicer, kinder, but once you try to start a conversation it's impossible. French will be French. You can't start a conversation after "How are you" with a flight attendant in France; You can only talk about the time, the destination, the service, what's with the airplane, and how's the captain. Nothing about yourself such as "I woke up at 4 for this flight" or "Is it hard being a flight attendant?". Try it. If you actually can engage a conversation, then it's an exception, or you're an attractive chick.
So there, 7 hours of flight. Pretty good compared to 8 hours usually. We had personal TVs, with 12 movies to choose from. Mostly boring ass emo french movies like "Conversation with my Gardener" or "Pur Weekend" "J'veux pas que tu t'en ailles" or "Le prix a payer". Jeez when I re-read this I feel like the makers had nothing better to do than crappy movies, and ran out of time to pick a title for their movie. What the fuck kind of movie titles are these?!
Then there were the better and funner american movies like Ass Pirates of the Caribbean meet the Chinese Sons of Bitches, Shrek the Third, Spider Balls 3, The Hoax, George Clooney and Brad Pitt hold up yet a third Casino, aaaannnnnd Mr.Bean's Holiday!! Yay! I watched the latter, because I love Mr.Bean, but I didn't expect the movie to be all about France, so it was unexpected.... and it sucked to see France again when being on the plane to Canada -__-". Overall it's an OK movie, it's not as good as the series, but it's OK. I still haven't seen the first one so I don't know if it's better or not.
Then I arrived in Toronto. This time the plane did not fly above York U. Last time I saw the campus from the plane I was psyched, but not this time. Meh. Once arrived I had to get to the customs, and pass what I call the "Hall of Death" where millions of people line up for about 30 booths where customs people ask you obvious questions such as "What's your name" when it's written on your passport and immigration card, and stuff like "where do you live." Then comes the killer questions: "Why are you in Canada", "What do you do", "Who sends you", "Who do you work for". Jeez I thought Canada was a free country, what is this; a mafioso hunt down?! The question that disturbs me the most is "Why are you in Canada", not only does it feel like they're trying to make you spit out something like "OK OK I ADMIT IT IM SELLING DRUGS PLEASE DON'T KILL ME" or since I'm the sarcastic and playful type I would love to answer "Why not?" But then you won't be hearing from me for a while.
I got lucky at the customs and arrived amongst the first people. But it figures it's not so good; When I arrived at the luggage trail, I had to wait about 30 minutes for my bag to come (if not more), amongst Chinese people with 10 bags, Indians with 4 kids and as many bags as the Chinese (all lifted by the mother!), one French guy with his adopted kids running around screaming and getting hit by cases and trollies and then crying out loud, and old ladies walking in front of me, blocking my view with their fat asses. I told Kenta to come at 1 to pick me up, but by the time I got my bags it was about 3! Luckily he was there, and we went to his house, where we spoke a mix of Japanese and English, and recorded my brand new song! Yay!

The End

The next day we loaded the van with my stuff and went our way to York. The bigger, better, and less secure campus of York, on Keele street. And what a campus, there are tonnes of clubs, restaurants, and you know how they say that the best things in life are free? Well guess what, I got free lunch, free gum and free drinks today. I only spent my money on the new Baconator from Wendy's. It was yummy, but too greasy. You can taste the oil.
Heh, in the school's newspaper I also got tonnes of discounts at BURGER KING for example by one get one free, or two can dine for 7 bucks or something. Free burgers, tonnes of discounts, free food.... no doubt, this is is Canada!

Today I attended the York *something* Fair, where every club at York promotes itself in booths. I signed up to the Japanese club, the Chinese club, the radio, the international club and the intramural sports club. It was funny to see the representatives of each club. The engineering club was all Chinese, the east African club was all Indonesian (wtf), the science and maths club was Chinese too.
The intramural sports club sounds fun, we compete against other residences in a chosen sport. I chose golf, broom ball, volleyball, and some other lazy sports I like. The dude at the booth was some weird ass nerd with a childish voice.
I go up to him:
-Hey there!
-Hi! How's it going?
-Pretty good! How bout you?
-Pretty good!
-So what do you have for me here?
-Go ahead! Ask me questions!
-Huh?
-You got the questions, I got the answers!
-Well yea I asked "What do you have for me"...
-What do I have for you? Well what do you have for me??
-*wtf he answers with questions?!* ... well you'll have my membership if you tell me what you got for me! So, what's your club about??
Then the guy looks at me through his glasses and starts laughing and pointing at me with a real white and nerdy laugh
-Hahahaha! Hhahahahha! hahahahah!! You're funny! I like you, you're a funny guy! hahahahah!
-*wtf* k.... jeez just tell me what your club is!

Then we went on and I signed up. This guy was weird. Maybe he was just trying to befriend me, but failed.

So it seems I'm gonna have a pretty busy year, finally!
My suite mates are pretty cool ish.... one's a rebel against society and dresses like white guys who play DDR all day long with big ass baggy pants with chains, and piercings, then the other's an exchange student from Romania (she's single, but is sentimental, so no sex for her dispite her big boobs and well shaped legs and ass). And an hour or two ago her room mate moved in. A little Chinese girl. She's 17, she's a freshman, and she's studying chemistry. No doubt, she's Chinese. She's rather petite but not ugly, phew.

So yes we are basically 2 dudes with 4 chicks. What are the odds of that. I thought I was the only dude amongst 5 chicks when I first moved in before meeting the other dude. That would have been a manga situation.
Oh well.

So this about concludes my first days back in Canada. Let's hope every day's as fulfilling as these past ones.

And fuck France.

Back in Toronto, with love,
-Teoman

The Weakly Video - Jerry's Store-O-Rama

Good spoof!